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The Cost of Being a Stay-at-Home Mom




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By MP Dunleavey
Article Courtesy of MSN.com

When I was at college in the ’80s (and a feisty, liberal-arts women’s college it was), the notion of staying home with your kids was, shall we say, unpopular. Why spend four expensive years preparing for your supposedly brilliant career if you weren’t going to put the kids where God and feminism intended them: in daycare?

So it’s been fascinating to watch the pendulum swing the other way the last 15 years, as women of my generation and older faced the untold frustrations of trying to work full time and raise a family. Injuries to the number of women whose heads hit the glass ceiling soared.

In her 1997 landmark book “The Second Shift,” Arlie Hochschild reported that most women who worked full time still did most of the housework. Many others found they were working to pay for child care, so they could keep working — to pay for child care.

No wonder more and more of us began to reconsider the stay-at-home option, or variations thereof (flextime, working from home, extended maternity leave, etc.). As Mary Snyder, co-author of “You Can Afford to Stay Home With Your Kids,” told me, “It’s a total priority shift. Women don’t want the Supermom Syndrome. It looked great from the outside, but once you were in it, you were miserable and you couldn’t excel at anything.”





There Is 1 Response So Far »

  1. I too am struggling to be an at home mom versus continuing working and possibly starting a career. One thing that I wanted to add to that was I was watching the Oprah show some months ago with California Governor Schwarzenegger’s wife, Maria Shriver does a women’s conference and she said that being a powerful woman does not mean you have to a career woman and if it is that great. The point is even if you stay at home, you choose to do so and therefore that empowers yo to be a strong decisive woman.

    I now do not feel so bad for being at home and have decided that my initial thoughts of staying at home before my baby could tell me if something wrong has happened has been the right decision in first place.

    And yes, you can survive with one income.

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